When you constantly live in your adaptive self so that you don't have to risk being rejected, you might be safer -- but you might also be limiting yourself big time.

 

Today, we had the honor of interviewing our mentor and coach, Andrew Bentley. In this episode, he shares key insights for folks who aren't satisfied with settling and he gives practical tips for taking action now!

 

Andrew Bentley recommended these books for those just getting started with a dive into personal development:

Andrew says he has been on a "consciousness kick" lately, so he also recommends these books to folks who are interested:

You can reach Andrew Bentley via IG: @bentley238
 
Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com
 
P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks we talk about in the episode:

Your marriage deserves a retreat!

 

We can't wait to hang out with you at two upcoming events:

 

DYMC VIRTUAL MARRIAGE RETREAT:

  • This LIVE event is just around the corner, so be sure to register right away! August 14-15, 2021 - just $37
  • Learn 5 Communication and Conflict Resolution Tools
  • Talk Confidently about your Sex Life
  • Download the Workbook with all the Tools and Handouts
  • Interact with other Couples
  • Take a Custom Online Assessment for Your Marriage

DYMC COUPLES CRUISE:

  • June 14-18, 2021
  • We want to keep the cruise relatively small, so we will cap the registration. Sign up today and our travel agents will be in touch to collect a $200 registration deposit.
  • Depart from Miami, Florida on Monday, June 14th, 2021 on Navigator of the Seas
  • Visit Nassau, Bahamas and CocoBay, Bahamas!
  • Includes: Beautiful Stateroom, All Food, Tips, Tax, and Registration Fees
  • Includes: 4 Marriage Bootcamp Group Sessions with Adam and Karissa
  • Optional individual or couple's counseling with Adam, Karissa, or another counselor (limited slots available upon request - sign-ups start in 2021)
  • Optional Couple Massage and Other Couple Activities

 

E-mail us with any questions you have!

hello@dearyoungmarriedcouple.com

 

Here are the links for the two events. We can't wait to be with you!

DYMC VIRTUAL MARRIAGE RETREAT: August 14-15, 2020

DYMC COUPLES CRUISE: June 14-18, 2021

 

Ever wonder why your spouse doesn't receive your feedback well? In this episode, you'll learn lots of tips for how to make sure you're actually giving feedback and not criticism.

 

 

Our guests for today's episode are Aaron and Jocelyn Freeman of The Empowered Couples Podcast and authors of "The Argument Hangover".

 

 

They cover everything "Conflict Resolution" in this episode as they share helpful hints for the person giving feedback and also valuable tools for the person who wants to learn how to receive feedback better. In short, you'll learn how to fight smarter.

 

 

Aaron and Jocelyn recommended:

 
You can reach Jocelyn and Aaron via their website at: www.meetthefreemans.com 
 
 
Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com
 
P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks we talk about in the episode:

In today's episode, we have a conversation with Yvette Kumar, LMFT about how anxiety impacts us as individuals and how it can affect the marriage.

 

 

Yvette teaches several practical tools for overcoming anxiety and all from a Christian perspective.

 

 

Yvette recommended:

 
You can reach Yvette via e-mail at: ykumar.lmft@gmail.com 
 
 
Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com
 
P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks we talk about in the episode:

In last week's episode, we shared some tips for speaking about difficult topics like SEX and MONEY. This week, we're sharing some tips for how to listen and understand when your spouse does bring something up.

 

Here's the link to our upcoming live VIRTUAL MARRIAGE RETREAT: https://event.webinarjam.com/register/1/n6075a7 

 

Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com
 
P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks that we created for you and your spouse:

Sex and Money - two topics of conversation that often get you to shut down or heat up (maybe in more ways than one?).

If you're going to bring up a conversation that you think could cause some more-than-normal tension, trigger unpacked emotions, or even some pain, it's important to let your spouse know that you're going to throw the ball. If you don't give them the heads-up, you might hit them in the back of the head, causing further negative emotion, pain, and tension around the topic next time it gets brought up.⁠

Here are some ways to give your spouse a heads-up:⁠

  • "Babe, I need to unpack a pretty big conversation box with you that has to with our sex life. I want to make sure we're both in a good mental space for it. Would tomorrow during the kids' nap time be a good time for us to discuss a few needs that we both have about our intimacy?"⁠
  • "I know we both want to win with money and we each have some ideas to put on the table for how to best do that. Do you think we could both do some research between now and Saturday on retirement investment options and then we could work toward a decision together on Saturday after breakfast?"⁠
  • "Babe, I have an important need to share with you about our spending. Is now a good time to chat?"⁠
  • "Hey Babe - when in the next week or so would be a good time for us to have a check-in about how often we have sex? I know today's probably not the best day and I'd like for us both to have time to think about it before we check-in."⁠

P.S. If you call your spouse something other than Babe, that works too. 😆 More about these conversation stems in today's episode.

 

Here is the link to our upcoming LIVE virtual marriage retreat: https://event.webinarjam.com/register/1/n6075a7 

 

Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com
 
P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks we talk about in the episode:

 

Whether you think you're married to someone from a different culture than your own or not, this podcast is for you!

The truth is, we all come from different family cultures, and when we marry someone, we're faced with many challenges of adopting, adapting, or dismissing various family traditions and norms that we bring into the marriage.

In today's episode, Jonathan and Tiffany Bonilla, youth pastors in Florida, share their experience marrying into a culture different than their own. They discuss language barriers, familial expectations, spiritual alignment, and more. 

Jonathan and Tiffany recommended:

You can find Tiffany and Jonathan on IG: @tiffboni + @jonboni_
 
Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com
 
P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks we talk about in the episode:

Rachael was born by artificial insemination to two moms and moved every few years while Montie grew up witnessing the outgrowth of "street life" and the conflicts that surround gang culture - their story about changing generational patterns in your marriage is one you don't want to miss.

“One of the biggest impacts for both us, even when we were just dating, was going to families’ houses in the church and being blown away at the family interactions and all their love. Neither of us had seen that growing up.⁠ It was like a dream to look at them and think ‘We can create that for own family.’” Montie and Rachael Easter

How do you pursue a godly relationship that was originally founded by the world’s standards? How do you create a thriving, two-parent household without having that example growing up? Come join the conversation on today's episode.

You can find Montie and Rachael on IG: @rachael.easter + @montie_trc⁠
 
Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com
 
P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks we talk about in the episode:

"Looks actually do matter," says Pastor Myron Wideman Jr., in reference to looking for a potential spouse. Myron is Karissa's former student in the Bachelor of Science in Human Development Program at Wilson University and he earned a concentration in Counseling. He's also the Associate Pastor at Dekalb UPC in Stone Moutain, GA (Metro Atlanta Area). In this episode, we discuss:

  • Biblical Perspective of Physical Attraction
  • Keeping up with Your Physical Appearance while Married
  • Ways to Support Your Spouse's Eating/Exercise Goals
  • Sex vs. Intimacy
  • Scheduling Sex
  • Coming to Bed Intentionally

Myron Wideman Jr. recommended:

You can find Myron Wideman on IG: @myronwidemanjr
 
Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com
 
P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks we talk about in the episode:

Wow... We just finished learning from three amazing friends and colleagues about their experiences, perspectives, insight, and lessons. As we type this description (today, Juneteenth), our hearts are heavy and our motivation is high to listen, learn, and continue this conversation -- or as one of our panelists suggested, "Don't stop the conversation when it gets uncomfortable."

Our prayer for you is that you can take down your walls as you listen to these stories and try to learn from the lessons that they teach us -- all of us.

Our guests on the panel are:

  • —Cynthia Eldridge: Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and School Counselor at a Community Day School in Sacramento
  • —Dr. Daniel Blash: Licensed Psychologist, Pastor, and Vice Dean of Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion at St. Louis University School of Medicine
  • —Kevin Goward: Owner of a Signing Agent Service Company (Banking/Finance Industry for 16 years) and Licensed Minister

Some of the topics that our panelists covered (based on your and our questions) are:

  • Significance of Juneteenth
  • Black Lives Matter as a statement vs. organization
  • Identity as People of Color (Black, African-American) and Identity as a Child of God
  • Experiences with racism as a child and adult (both decades ago and months ago)
  • Statements like "All Lives Matter"
  • Interracial Marriage
  • Racism in the Church

We had so many takeaways from this conversation, but we'd like to hear from you... What's something you learned today?

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